Post by NancyRogers on May 13, 2007 21:07:45 GMT -6
For Sharon in Tennessee --
My heart aches for what you are going through right now. It is very lonely, I know.
My husband died suddenly as well - I was a widow at 47. Our children were gone and I lived alone. In the beginning there were many friends but they all were gone within a month. Decided that happened for 2 reasons - the women were afraid I was or would be interested in their husbands or the men felt their own mortality. So they did "their duty" - shared one meal with me and that was it.
Luckily I got involved in 2 support groups - one was for young widows, the other was open to anyone. It is good to go and share with others - and listen to what they have to say as well. One of our friends who just lost his wife said he wouldn't go to any "pity party" - but it's not like that. It helps you realize that what you are feeling is normal, it gives you insight into how others react and you will make friends there who can share your pain and that you will have something in common with.
I met my very best friend at the young widows group - her husband died a month after mine - and now 17 years later we are still very close - she lives in the LA area and I am in Kansas City - but you'd never know there is that distance between us. Still have other friends from the groups as well.
If Nancy is willing to be a mediator for want of a better word she can give you my address and I'll be glad to write to you and share experiences.
You're in my thoughts and prayers -- and yes, prayer does help an awful lot.
Rosemarie in rural Kansas City
My heart aches for what you are going through right now. It is very lonely, I know.
My husband died suddenly as well - I was a widow at 47. Our children were gone and I lived alone. In the beginning there were many friends but they all were gone within a month. Decided that happened for 2 reasons - the women were afraid I was or would be interested in their husbands or the men felt their own mortality. So they did "their duty" - shared one meal with me and that was it.
Luckily I got involved in 2 support groups - one was for young widows, the other was open to anyone. It is good to go and share with others - and listen to what they have to say as well. One of our friends who just lost his wife said he wouldn't go to any "pity party" - but it's not like that. It helps you realize that what you are feeling is normal, it gives you insight into how others react and you will make friends there who can share your pain and that you will have something in common with.
I met my very best friend at the young widows group - her husband died a month after mine - and now 17 years later we are still very close - she lives in the LA area and I am in Kansas City - but you'd never know there is that distance between us. Still have other friends from the groups as well.
If Nancy is willing to be a mediator for want of a better word she can give you my address and I'll be glad to write to you and share experiences.
You're in my thoughts and prayers -- and yes, prayer does help an awful lot.
Rosemarie in rural Kansas City