Post by Baking_Bud on Dec 1, 2002 14:33:11 GMT -6
Hi Everyone!,
This topic might seem a little Bah Humbugish, but it is one that has played with my heart and mind for many years. The reason? Expectations of myself and others in what I had to make in respect to food items. I was 1/2 of the ENTIRE Christmas dinner for 22 years at my in-laws, (20-25 people) which kept me in the kitchen for 2 days. This didn't include all of the marketing to get the needed ingredients. By the time Christmas dinner was finally being served, I had a backache that ruined any enjoyment of the day. And it also ruined my Christmas spirit, for can't say I was brimming over with happiness. I hated it, my husband hated it, and even my mother-in-law hated it, but we were made to play out this same game every year because of my father-in-law. He heard my MIL and myself talking one year about using deli items, etc., and he whined and said that, 'if it wasn't homemade, he wasn't going to eat it!" I could see in my MIL's face right then that THIS was the way it had to be in her life. So out of respect to her, I played this game out every year which denied me being able to spend Christmas Eve enjoying my own mother and my children. ( I was too busy making food for the next day to stop for long, and my atttitude of frenzy stunk to high heaven!) On this day, 3 years ago, I lost my beloved mother. Thirty days later, my husband lost his mother to a simple cold that turned into pneumonia. And this last May, my FIL passed away.
So now I am out to lose my Bah Humbug spirit. I am free to do the holidays any way that I want. And this year, I did it my way. My ham came pre-made and spiral sliced, honey smoked flavor even! My turkey came in a large cooked chunk, and its taste was no different than if I baked it in my own oven. The deli section at my store provided many wonderful items to choose from, with the spiced baked apples especially appreciated and liked. Mashed potatoes and gravy came via a run through KFC. The rest of the meal I did make. Stove Top Stuffing, one incredible pumpkin pie by Bisquick, and 1 banana cream pie.
I actually enjoyed doing the marketing, for I knew that I was not then going to have to RUSH home and begin a massive cook-a-thon. I actually smiled at other shoppers, and sympathized with those that wore the face that I had in the past. I even helped a woman who looked so worn out find the black olives that she had missed. And, I was able to find the du jour rolls that my family likes, as if it was a good omen!
And everyone, including myself, enjoyed our Thanksgiving meal.
The point to my note is that I don't want anyone else to have the same regrets that I now carry over FOOD being the main focus, over any holiday. That isn't the purpose of what any of them should bring to our hearts. I could have made each and everyone of those items up above and all would have been a tad better, but it would have denied me the 'joy' we should find at any holiday and get together. I will never do that to myself, or to any future daughter-in-law I may one day have.
I am already planning how to 'capture' our Christmas dinner! And this year, I plan to actually ENJOY the holiday with my family. I love to cook and bake, but not at the expense of what I've missed. I hope my note helps others not to end up with the same regrets that I have.
Always With My Best, Baking Bud
This topic might seem a little Bah Humbugish, but it is one that has played with my heart and mind for many years. The reason? Expectations of myself and others in what I had to make in respect to food items. I was 1/2 of the ENTIRE Christmas dinner for 22 years at my in-laws, (20-25 people) which kept me in the kitchen for 2 days. This didn't include all of the marketing to get the needed ingredients. By the time Christmas dinner was finally being served, I had a backache that ruined any enjoyment of the day. And it also ruined my Christmas spirit, for can't say I was brimming over with happiness. I hated it, my husband hated it, and even my mother-in-law hated it, but we were made to play out this same game every year because of my father-in-law. He heard my MIL and myself talking one year about using deli items, etc., and he whined and said that, 'if it wasn't homemade, he wasn't going to eat it!" I could see in my MIL's face right then that THIS was the way it had to be in her life. So out of respect to her, I played this game out every year which denied me being able to spend Christmas Eve enjoying my own mother and my children. ( I was too busy making food for the next day to stop for long, and my atttitude of frenzy stunk to high heaven!) On this day, 3 years ago, I lost my beloved mother. Thirty days later, my husband lost his mother to a simple cold that turned into pneumonia. And this last May, my FIL passed away.
So now I am out to lose my Bah Humbug spirit. I am free to do the holidays any way that I want. And this year, I did it my way. My ham came pre-made and spiral sliced, honey smoked flavor even! My turkey came in a large cooked chunk, and its taste was no different than if I baked it in my own oven. The deli section at my store provided many wonderful items to choose from, with the spiced baked apples especially appreciated and liked. Mashed potatoes and gravy came via a run through KFC. The rest of the meal I did make. Stove Top Stuffing, one incredible pumpkin pie by Bisquick, and 1 banana cream pie.
I actually enjoyed doing the marketing, for I knew that I was not then going to have to RUSH home and begin a massive cook-a-thon. I actually smiled at other shoppers, and sympathized with those that wore the face that I had in the past. I even helped a woman who looked so worn out find the black olives that she had missed. And, I was able to find the du jour rolls that my family likes, as if it was a good omen!
And everyone, including myself, enjoyed our Thanksgiving meal. The point to my note is that I don't want anyone else to have the same regrets that I now carry over FOOD being the main focus, over any holiday. That isn't the purpose of what any of them should bring to our hearts. I could have made each and everyone of those items up above and all would have been a tad better, but it would have denied me the 'joy' we should find at any holiday and get together. I will never do that to myself, or to any future daughter-in-law I may one day have.
I am already planning how to 'capture' our Christmas dinner! And this year, I plan to actually ENJOY the holiday with my family. I love to cook and bake, but not at the expense of what I've missed. I hope my note helps others not to end up with the same regrets that I have.
Always With My Best, Baking Bud
Hi Carnation, aka Dee!,
Think I can handle throwing all into the blender, blending for 1 minute, and then pouring it into a greased pie plate! But 'those' will be the only type of recipes I will allow myself to undertake. A corn pudding here, some tasty green beans there, and the rest captured and brought home fully made!